петък, юли 15


Problems with the American Free Zone

Lobster on Sand reports that the AFZ my not be as solid as first thought. A correspondent on Guido Fawkes' blog informs us that a family of four Americans have been seen in London. I have received the following photographic evidence that the report is indeed true. Unfortunately the correspondent, a Mr S Gran, doesn't inform us where in London they were seen. If you recognise the location, your help would be appreciated.

Please try to remember that you can rude about Americans, but you must try not to hurt them. I have seen it reported elsewhere that it is OK to hate people. Well its not. Even though humans have done great damage to sea creatures, we must try to remember that humans are not as advanced as marine life. They cannot breathe underwater for instance.

Just to show you what nice people Americans can be, I have assembled a list of four great all-American heroes. They are:

1. Lance Armstrong
2. Fred Flintstone
3. Big Chief Sitting Bull
4. Ben Johnson

On the other hand, it was quite hard to find a list of four all-American bad boys. After much searching around, the list is:

1. Donald Rumsfeld
2. Darth Vader
3. Madonna
4. George Bush

My advice for enforcing the American Free Zone would be to treat any Americans that stray into it in the same way you would treat a goose that had wandered onto your best flower-bed - shoo them away. Remember that since Americans try to be eminantly agreeable, you can always reason with them. Try saying: "It will keep you safer, and it will keep us safer".

Millions of Americans around the world are already helping by not being in London, but as ever, it takes just a few to spoil the fun for everyone else.
Brilliant and useful piece Lobster - the blogosphere needs much more of this sensible and informed opinion.

Can I just raise one teensy weensy little issue? Ben Johnson (the runner) was actually from Jamaica but running for Canada (and I guess Canada is part of America really).
I want big "american free zone" stickers to put on store windows and in public bathrooms and stuff.

Every Mc. Donald's from here to NYC will have american free bathrooms!!
Yay! Scary I think you are spot on and have identified exactly what the US needs - more AFZs!

Lobster - is it possible to extend the AFZ project to probably the most needy place in the world? America?
OK ScaryCheri, you've obviously got a real need here. I am going to ask the whole Lobster Blogster team to stop what they are doing and concentrate their efforts on producing big "American Free Zone" stickers. American Free Bathrooms is a worthy ideal indeed.
I think I may have found my calling in life...thank you lobster...oh thank you!
lol, American Free Tree's.....oohh...lol!
Hey People!!!

Please consider this:
Not ALL Americans are bad.

Only our wonderful military, our highly intellectual government and our lovely criminals!

Ok. So there IS indeed a lot of bad things you can say about us Americans.

But I don't consider myself bad!?!

It's ok to be angry, but please, don't group ALL Americans in a category just because SOME of us are agitating!!!

If you lived HERE in the U.S. - you might be surprised to find out that a vast majority of Americans don't like what our president and our government is doing right now!

Many of us want our troups to get OUT of other countries, and we are fed up with war, and President Bush.
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